for ur frnd sms

If kisses were water, I will give u sea. If hugs were leaves, I will give u a tree.If u luv a planet, I will give u a galaxy, if friendship is life I will give u mine.

People live People die People Laugh People Cry Some give up Some will try Some say hi Some say bye Others may forget YOU but never will I.

If I were to be anything in this world…. I’d be ur tears!!!… So, I can be conceived in ur heart, born in ur eyes, live on ur cheeks & die on ur lips!!!!!

If u r a chocolate ur the sweetest, if u r a Teddy Bear u r the most huggable, If u are a Star u r the Brightest, and since u r my “FRIEND” u r the “BEST”!!!!!!!!!

A special friend is rare indeed, it beems to be special breed, yes, perfect friends r very few, so lucky I m for having you.

They say it takes a minute 2 fine a special person, an hour 2 appreciate them, a day 2 love them, but then an entire life 2 forget them.

When God opened the window of the Heaven He asked me: What is your wish for today? “I said : please take special care of the person reading this!!!!!!!”

Time might lead me to nowhere and faith might break into pieces but I will always be THANKFUL that once in my life’s journey we became FRIENDS!

It takes half our life to find true friends & half of it keeping them. I am lucky to have spent less than half my life finding you & wish to

friendship sms

Flowers need sunshine, violets need dew, all angels in heaven know I need u. years may fly, tears may dry, but my friendship with u will never die.

One day u will ask me: What is more important to you, me or your life? I will say: my life… You will walk away from me without knowing that U R MY LIFE!!!

Feel good when somebody Miss u. Feel better when somebody Loves u. But feel best when somebody never forgets u.

A friend is sweet when its new….but it is sweeter when its TRUE! But u know what? Its sweetest when its you.

A friend gives hope when life is low, a friend is a place when you have nowhere to go, a friend is honest, a friend is true. A friend is precious a friend is u.

new type of addition and may more

A boy was teaching a girl arithmetic, he said, it was his mission.

He kissed her once; he kissed her twice and said, “Now that’s addition.”

In silent satisfaction, she sweetly gave the kisses back and said, “Now that’s subtraction.”

boy and girl

Then he kissed her, she kissed him, without an explanation.

And both together smiled and said, “That’s multiplication.”

Then her Dad appeared upon the scene and made a quick decision.

He kicked that boy three blocks away and said, “That’s long division!”

goverment dog

Four men were bragging about how smart their dogs were.

One man was an engineer, the second man was an accountant, the third man was a chemist, and the fourth was a government worker.

To show off, the engineer called to his dog. “T-square, do your stuff.” T-square trotted over to a desk, took out some paper and a pen, and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle.

Everyone agreed that that that was pretty smart.

The accountant said that his dog could do better. He called to his dog and said,”Spreadsheet, do your stuff.” Spreadsheet went out into the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies.He divided them into four equal piles of three cookies each.

Everyone agreed that that was good.

The chemist said that his dog could do better still.he called to his dog and said, “Measure, do your stuff.” Measure got up, walked over to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a ten-ounce glass from the cupboard, and poured exactly eight ounces without spilling a drop.

Everyone agreed that that was pretty impressive.

Then the three men turned to the government worker and said, “What can your dog do?”

The government worker called to his dog and said, “Coffee Break, do your stuff.” Coffee Break jumped to his feet, ate the cookies, drank the milk, claimed he had injured his back while doing so, filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions, put in for worker’ compensation, and went home for the rest of the day on sick leave.

They all agreed that that was brilliant!

i am going

Santa: I am going ka matlab batao.

Banta: Main ja raha hoon.

Santa: Main nahi jane dunga, pehle matlab bata.

mr santa singh

Have you heard of Mr. Santa Singh applying to a medical school to become a doctor

Needless to say he never made it. You know why?

These are the answers he wrote in his entrance exam.

Antibody - Against everyone
Artery - The study of the paintings.

Bacteria - Back door to a cafeteria.

Caesarean section - A district in Rome.
Cardiology - Advance study of poker playing.
Cat scan - Searching for lost kitty.
Chronic - Neck of a crow.
coma - Punctuation mark.
Cortisone - Area around local court.
cyst - Short for sister.

Diagnosis - Person with slanted nose.
Dilate - The late British Princess Diana.
Dislocation - In this place.
Duodenum - Couple in blue jeans.

Enema - Not a friend.

Fake labour - Pretending to work.

Genes - Blue denim.

Hernia - She is close by.

Impotent - Distinguished/well known.

Labor pain - Hurt at work.
Lactose - People without toes.
Lymph - Walk unsteadily.

Microbes - Small dressing gown.

Obesity - City of Obe.

Pacemaker - Winner of Nobel peace prize.
Proteins - In favor of teens
Pulse - Grain.
Pus - Small cat.

Red blood count - Dracula.

Secretion - Hiding anything.

Tablet - Small table.

Ultrasound - Radical noise

dont believe in genie

A couple was golfing one day on a Very Exclusive golf course lined with million dollar houses. On the third tee, the husband said, “Honey, be very careful when you drive the ball, do not knock out any windows. It will cost us a fortune to fix.”

The wife teed up and shanked it right through the window of the biggest house on the course.

The husband cringed and said, “I told you to watch out for the houses. All right, let’s go up there, apologize and see how much it’s going to cost us.”

They walked up and knocked on the door, and heard a voice say, “Come on in.”

When they opened the door they saw glass all over the place and a broken bottle lying on its side in the foyer. A man on the couch said, “Are you the people that broke the window?”

“Uh yeah, sorry about that” the husband replied.

“No, actually I want to thank you. I am a genie that was trapped for a thousand years in that bottle. You have released me. I am allowed to grant three wishes - I will give you each one wish, and I will keep the last one for myself.” the genie said.

“OK” the husband said. “I want a million dollars a year for the rest of my life.”

“No problem-it is the least I can do. And you, what do you want?” the genie said looking at the wife.

“I want a house in every country of the world” she said.

“Consider it done.” the genie said.

“And what is your wish, genie?” the husband said, “Well, since I have not had love with a woman in a thousand years, my wish is to sleep with your wife.”

The husband looks at the wife and said, “Well, we did get a lot of money and all those houses, honey. I guess I would not mind.”

The genie took the wife upstairs and ravished her for two hours. After it was all over, the genie rolled over, looked at the wife and said, “How old is your husband anyway?”

“35″ she said.

“Really? And he still believes in genies !!!!!!!!!

bajar band ha

Ek bar 3 andhe bus mein safar kar rahe the usme ek ki daye aankh se andha tha toh dusra baye ankh se andha tha toh tisra dono aankh se andha tha.

Raste mein ek bola, “yaar aaj toh idhar ka bajar bandh hai toh dusra bola yaar isko toh thik se dikai bhi nahi deta bajar idhar ka bandh hai.”

Toh bich mein baitha bola, “Tum log bhi na andhe ho chuke ho, dhikai nahi deta bajar pura bandh hai.”

by ranu

nahi judge sahab

Ek din adaalat mein judge ne ek mujrim ko sajaa sunaate huye kaha, “Iske dono kaan kaat liye jaye.”

Mujrim ne bahoot bhaye ke saath kaha, “Rahem karo my baap, kaan kaat lenge toh main andha ho jaonga.”

Judge ne ascharya se poocha kaan kaatne se andhe kaise hoge, mujrim ne kaha “My baap kaan kaat lenge toh main chashma kahan lagaunga.”

foohl men

Teen aadmi ek ganja, doosra langra, tisra andha jo road paar kar rahe thay ki ek bus ka guzarna hua toh pehla aadmi bola, “Abe sala kaun tha jo mere balon ki setting hi bigad di.”

Doosra bola: “Ruk-ruk abhi sale ko pakadta hun.”

Tisra bola: “Koi baat nahi chhodo maine already uska number note kar liya hai.”

does ur dogs bite

A man was sitting near a dog. Another man appeared there and asked the first man Does your dog bites?

Man: No

The second man sits and the dog bites him!

Second man angrily: “You said it does not bites!”

Man: “This is not my dog.”